sábado, 18 de dezembro de 2010

Para interiorizar



"Se queremos fazer um belo jardim, devemos começar por fazer o seu esboço na nossa imaginação"

Dalai Lama

quarta-feira, 8 de dezembro de 2010

Come along

There is no room for tears in a breaking heart. It is thorn, all the pieces falling apart, you wish of not waking up in the next morning. For some months now you hate mornings, anyway. And you hate most of your days. You try to be indifferent to the pain, the suffering that he's causing you.
Not his fault, oh no, never his fault. You love him deep. You just can't love yourself enough to walk away from him, so you keep staying. And the sadness grows inside you. You can feel something is wrong, but you keep denying that it is your fault.
You allways knew, anyway. How on earth you'd expected him to choose you?! You knew he wouldn't. And now you cry. Finally you've come to terms with the reality you've been actively ignoring, pretending to believe in that fantasy.

Now you cry and try to put all that sadness outside you, but it just keeps on growing. Because you lost your hope and your dreams falled apart, and the one you wanted to hold you is not there for you. He's never been, actually. You understand that it was all in your silly head, don't you?

So you have no more room for all that sadness inside your heart, so you cry. You try to put all those ugly thoughts out of your head, but they keep coming back. You daydream about ending everything, stop this pain that is consuming you, you wish to die. And now you're afraid of yourself. You're afraid of doing something to yourself. Because you don't love yourself, you love him and he's not with you. He never was.


So come along, take my hand and let's get out of this place. I'll take care of you, you'll be okay. Promise.


segunda-feira, 29 de novembro de 2010

Just breathe

In and out, nice and slowly.

O que virá depois não sei, mas para já, isto chega-me.

quinta-feira, 11 de novembro de 2010

So sorry

"- Oh....I didn't see this coming...

- Me neither. What happened?

- I don't know. But it just did.
(start walking away)
Why did you let this happen?

- Me?!?! You're the one who's walking away!!!

- Yeah, but you're the one who's doing nothing to prevent me from walking away from you."

sábado, 6 de novembro de 2010

Don't let me go. Please.


sexta-feira, 5 de novembro de 2010

O início

Teresa caminhava em passo miudinho, apressado. Nada típico dela. Normalmente caminhava com um passo seguro, confiante. Sempre soube para onde ia, para quê hesitar? Mas hoje não era um dia normal. Não que estivesse com dúvidas...já tinha decidido. E quando punha uma ideia na cabeça não havia quem lhe fizesse frente ou a impedisse de chegar onde queria. Sabia que tinha que ir, sair daquele sítio onde tudo acontecera, esquecer, começar de novo.

Estava uma manhã fresca, uma luminosidade húmida de névoa. Os pássaros mais madrugadores chilreavam. Haviam poucas pessoas na rua, era sábado e a cidade acordava mais tarde. Aqui e ali, alguns noctívagos acabados de sair das últimas discotecas cambaleavam, eles talvez ainda ébrios, elas não apenas isso mas também desequilibradas nos seus saltos altos...rostos esborratados, ensonados...pelo menos era assim que Teresa os via hoje. Lembrou-se de algumas manhãs assim, ainda não há muito tempo...e rapidamente as afastou. Tinha tomado uma decisão.

Chegou ao aeroporto em cima da hora do fecho do check-in (há coisas que nunca mudam).

(to be continued)

Step by step


...towards the cliff.


Will you understand?

sábado, 23 de outubro de 2010

Never forget

Once, one of my best friends told me: "Be good to yourself. This is very important. No matter to who are you giving your love at the moment, that love should never, ever, be bigger than the love you have for yourself."

She knew me well. After some months, when we met again, she asked me if I was being good to myself. I said yes while my eyes looked down, so she couldn't see the lie behind my words. It would take only a little longer, I thought. I just had to be strong enough and keep my self-respect away for a while. Then it would be all right. I would be happy then. If I could just hang on for...some time.

She supported me when I tought my world had ended. She hold me and told me everything would be allright. That I was strong enough. I slowly started to believe her. I was strong.

Be good to yourself.
And now, more than six months later, I realize that I have not been good to myself. I don't even know what to do. I wonder how does it feel when you know, you know for sure, that what you're doing is what is best for you.
C, I miss you.
I'm still trying, but it seems I can't love myself enough. And I don't have anyone to tell me how important I am.

sábado, 2 de outubro de 2010

from: www.postsecret.com

sábado, 11 de setembro de 2010

domingo, 5 de setembro de 2010

.



Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.

sábado, 7 de agosto de 2010

domingo, 4 de julho de 2010

quarta-feira, 23 de junho de 2010

segunda-feira, 21 de junho de 2010

Eddie Vedder, estás lá

Ainda acerca disto...

A wikipédia diz que os fãs não perceberam que o "I'm still alive" não era bem uma frase de regojizo, mas sim uma constatação raivosa de quem vê a vida virar-se de pantanas, e tudo aquilo que tinha sonhado um dia ser possível....esvair-se como fumo.

Eu digo que entendemos bastante bem a ideia.

E o que após o choque pode parecer uma maldição acaba por ser a prova que somos mais fortes do que pensávamos. E que a vida continua.


E gritamos à puta de vida que de vez em quando nos troca as voltas e se ri dos nossos esforços para lutar pela felicidade:

I'm still alive!!!
E o resto que se foda.

quarta-feira, 16 de junho de 2010


domingo, 13 de junho de 2010

mais uma coisinha....




Espero 6ª feira à tarde poder cantar bem alto "I'm still alive!!!!"

-_-'

trans-1-cloro-4-(1,1-dimetiletil)ciclo-hexano




Pronto, era só isto.

sábado, 12 de junho de 2010

I would never let you fall...


I would take your pain away. I could make it better, you know? But you choose to close yourself in a shell, keeping me away from your thoughts.
It hurts, you know?
Don't push me away.
And never ever doubt my feelings for you. I poured out my soul for you, and you decided to laugh of it.

quinta-feira, 3 de junho de 2010

Undisclosed Desires






I know you've suffered
But I don't want you to hide
It's cold and loveless
I won't let you be denied

Soothing
I'll make you feel pure
Trust me
You can be sure

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart
I want to recognise your beauty's not just a mask
I want to exorcise the demons from your past
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

You trick your lovers
That you're wicked and divine
You may be a sinner
But your innocence is mine

Please me
Show me how it's done
Tease me
You are the one

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart
I want to recognise your beauty's not just a mask
I want to exorcise the demons from your past
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

Please me
Show me how it's done
Trust me
You are the one

I want to reconcile the violence in your heart
I want to recognise your beauty's not just a mask
I want to exorcise the demons from your past
I want to satisfy the undisclosed desires in your heart

(Shhh....vou contar-te um segredo: gostava que esta canção fosse de ti para mim)

quarta-feira, 2 de junho de 2010

Don't Quit




When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must, but do not quit.

Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit-
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit.


The darkest hour is before sunrise

segunda-feira, 24 de maio de 2010

Estou a pensar na próxima...




The main symbolisms of the dragonfly are renewal, positive force and the power of life in general. Dragonflies can also be a symbol of the sense of self that comes with maturity. Also, as a creature of the wind, the dragonfly frequently represents change. And as a dragonfly lives a short life, it knows it must live its life to the fullest with the short time it has – which is a lesson for all of us.

sábado, 22 de maio de 2010

Pensamento do dia

Quando o meu príncipe encantado aparecer finalmente na minha vida, dou-lhe 2 pares de estalos, assim a seco.


Depois pergunto-lhe onde raio é que andou metido este tempo todo.


Estúpido.


Estou farta de perder tempo com quem não gosta de mim o suficiente.


O quê? Não existem príncipes encantados? Duuuhhh.....digam-me algo que eu não saiba.

sexta-feira, 21 de maio de 2010

Ainda tu...

O que fazer quando toda a gente me diz para seguir em frente e eu continuo a pensar em ti? Não é simples desligar-me da tua recordação.

Dói.

quarta-feira, 19 de maio de 2010

O lado parvo da força....


...é grande em mim.


Descansa meu irmão que não vou cortar os pulsos, apesar de andar a explorar o lado dark.


São efeitos do monóxido de carbono, isto de trabalhar num centro comercial (aka meu inferno pessoal) tem efeitos trágicos na minha sanidade mental. E na dos utentes também. Hoje ouvi uma utente queixar-se que tinha uma pele muito radioactiva..... Duh.


O lado parvo da força também é muito grande nela. Já o senhor (senhora?) da foto abaixo tem um lado "fail" da força...impressionante, no mínimo.



Mas, mas.....a kitty??? Oh god....sim, ela sempre foi o terror da minha infância, que nunca entendi o fascínio de algumas amigas minhas por aquela coisa, e que qual S.Sebastião maléfico, regressa na minha idade adulta com toda a sua pseudo-ternura. Arghhh..



Já o Darth Vader, esse sim, é dos meus. Mau, terrível....e muito parvo. Entendam que o meu Darth Vader se aproxima muito mais do criado pelo Eddie Izzard do que aquele criado na Guerra das Estrelas. Até porque nunca vi a Guerra das Estrelas.





sexta-feira, 14 de maio de 2010

This time for real





"Nesta altura, tenho mais a perder do que a ganhar"

E como já tinha dito noutra altura, por vezes a maior prova de que gostamos de alguém é deixá-lo ir, para que encontre noutro lado a felicidade. Mas que dói....dói.


segunda-feira, 10 de maio de 2010

5 segundos na minha mente

Sim. Não. Talvez. às vezes. Ok, muitas vezes. Se calhar. É possível que sim. Definitivamente não. Nem pensar. Um bocadinho? Possivelmente.
E se...não, não. É assim e pronto. Mas por outro lado, talvez possa não o ser completamente.

Branco?? Preto, claro que preto. Com laivos de cinzento, vá. Acinzentado incerto.

Uff...

quinta-feira, 6 de maio de 2010

3 days in paradise....and hell in my head



You take the breath right out of me
You left a hole where my heart should be
...
You are really, my shooting star. Will you fade away, leaving me with my wishes throwned at the sky, hopeless dreams and a broken heart?

segunda-feira, 3 de maio de 2010

Goodbye

Goodbye my almost lover
Goodbye my hopeless dream

So long, my luckless romance
Should've known you'd bring me hearthache

...but I can't turn my back on you.

sábado, 1 de maio de 2010

quarta-feira, 28 de abril de 2010

Praia

Escrevo-te...
Palavras soltas que logo apago, por não me fazerem sentido.

Mas não faz sentido tambem aquilo que sinto e penso por vezes. Quero limitar-me a respirar e aproveitar o dia, sem pensar, mas só o consigo fazer por escassos minutos. Sinto o sol na minha pele, a secar a agua que escorre pelo meu corpo, deixando-a branca de sal aqui e ali. Oiço as ondas, constantes e tranquilas...e desejo que estivesses ali comigo. Lá vou eu outra vez. Obrigo-me a parar, a racionalizar e digo para mim mesma que não posso ter tudo o que quero, que mesmo que as coisas fossem diferentes e tu pudesses, nada me garante que quisesses estar ali comigo. "Mas eu não quero tudo...só a ele", diz a voz na minha cabeça. Pára, digo-lhe. Aproveita o facto de estares aqui. Tens que ser independente, não te prendas demasiado. É um bocadinho tarde demais para isso....


Levanto-me e vou dar outro mergulho, para tirar o sal que me incomoda na pele e os pensamentos que me incomodam o espírito.

quarta-feira, 21 de abril de 2010

Soon we'll be free



Come along it is the break of day
Surely now, you'll have some things to say
It's not the time for telling tales on me

So come along, it wont be long
'Til we return happy
Shut your eyes, there are no lies
In this world we call sleep
Let's desert this day of hurt
Tomorrow we'll be free


Let's not fight I'm tired can't we just sleep tonight
Don't Turn away it's just there's nothing left here to say
Turn around I know we're lost but soon we'll be found

Well it's been rough but we'll be just fine
Work it out yeah we'll survive

You mustn't let a few bad times dictate

So come along, it wont be long
'Til we return happy
Shut your eyes, there are no lies
In this world we call sleep
Let's desert this day of work
Tomorrow we'll be free

Let's not fight I'm tired can't we just sleep tonight
Don't turn away it's just there's nothing left here to say
Turn around I know we're lost but soon we'll be found

terça-feira, 20 de abril de 2010

Adam

Um dos melhores filmes que vi nos últimos tempos...




...ri, chorei...e desejei ter um Adam na minha vida, que me levasse a ver racoons no parque, que me mostrasse as estrelas do céu e que percorresse uma cidade desconhecida no meio da neve para me dizer que não poderia ir para outro lugar sem mim.

Afinal de contas, a vida continua.

segunda-feira, 19 de abril de 2010

domingo, 18 de abril de 2010

Fallen Angel


As lágrimas são as palavras que o coração não consegue dizer
Custa tanto...
...onde andas tu?

sábado, 10 de abril de 2010

Sem qualquer dúvida...




Continuas a ser a melhor parte do meu dia
:)

quarta-feira, 31 de março de 2010

31.03

É o teu dia. O meu presente para ti? Já to dei, há algum tempo...e que se há-de manter teu por muitos aniversários, teus e meus. Será teu enquanto o quiseres. Trata-o bem, que tem passado por dias difíceis.






Sim, tenho chorado muito.


Sim, já senti que o (meu) mundo ia desabar.

E ainda assim...




O meu coração pertence-te.

sábado, 27 de março de 2010

Dói tanto...


This girl tries her best everyday, but it all goes to waste
She was dancing for life, she had joy in her voice
Loves you with all her heart
Now she doesn't make a sound...

sexta-feira, 26 de março de 2010

After the quake

You have to breathe slowly. You have to keep your ground. Yes, there will be replicas, and they are painful too. After the first shock of feeling the earth bouncing under your feet, replicas can frighten you.

Keep breathing.

Yes, I know it's hard and that it seems you lost everything, and that nothing is going to be the same again. You are right, they won't. When an earthquake shakes our ground and destroys everything we held on dearly, we feel like everything's gone for good. But don't think that you'll never have it all again, or even better! Life has it's mysteries, and sometimes things don't happen the way we planned or wished for.

Breathe in, breathe out.

You know you are strong enough. These kind of things keep on happening to you not because you attract disasters or because you're no good, but because you are strong enough to take them and keep your head high. You so much better than you think, you've been told this before.

Yes, you have a hard road ahead. But you're not alone. Be thankful for all the lovely people you have around you. Sure you'd like to have his shoulder to cry, his arms to hold you tight and his voice telling you everything will be fine...but you also know that it's not possible, not know. It's being hard for him aswell, I'm pretty sure about that. The future?? Who knows... every chance is still open, almost everything can happen. I know this is not what you wanted to hear from me, but it's how it is...no more fairytales, my dear.

Keep dreaming, but don't let your dreams take you away from reality. Life's not perfect.

Yes, you've told me before how much you love him, and I know you miss him a lot. It is painful, for sure... I would take your pain away, if I could...

sexta-feira, 19 de março de 2010

quinta-feira, 18 de março de 2010

Breathe in, Breathe out

....and take it easy, girl.


Grow up. Be you.
Find yourself.
Be happy.



terça-feira, 16 de março de 2010

domingo, 14 de março de 2010

And now, for something completly different....


No escape

Take it....





How can I escape from my own made-up dreams, from my fantasy land where everything's perfect and I can see you smiling to me while I tell you once again how much I love you...?



Was it all in my fucked up mind?



Maybe "us" existed only in my head, but the pain is real.



Thank you for bringing me back to reality. I was becoming someone else but me.

sábado, 13 de março de 2010

quarta-feira, 3 de março de 2010

Quero dizer tanta coisa e não sei por onde começar...


Hold on girl, you know you're stong enough


Será isto uma fuga...?


Take it easy, you know what you want


Lembras-te do dia em que nos conhecemos? Eu lembro.
Vou pôr o pé na estrada, já sinto as borboletas na barriga, mais uma vez a sair da minha zona de conforto...uff.
Lembro-me de ler que a vertigem não é mais do que a vontade de nos lançarmos, de nos atirarmos ao vazio. Deve ser por isso que tenho tantas...
Os sentimentos misturam-se, contraditórios, na minha cabeça. Enquanto isso, o meu coração sabe exactamente onde quer ir.


Hoje não é um bom dia para ter dúvidas. Hoje...

Do you remember the night when I had to play your angel, saving your soul...?
Even though you were holding on tight, part of you was taken by the demons below.
You said you feel like a bruise on a beautiful body...


Vou. Mas levo-te comigo.


A ponte que nos separa da outra margem é apenas um desafio que um dia, quando estivermos prontos, iremos atravessar. Juntos. E eu não vou saltar.




terça-feira, 2 de março de 2010

Let's do it

Let's be...extraordinary ;)

segunda-feira, 1 de março de 2010

Wasting time

This love is just a waste of your energy
And this life is just a waste of our time
So why don't we get together
And we could waste everything, tonight
And we could waste
We could waste it all.....


Together ;)

terça-feira, 23 de fevereiro de 2010

sábado, 30 de janeiro de 2010

Worlds apart


Under the weight of my wings you can feel my heart beat.
I know how you feel, I've been there myself.
Come, come to my sweet melodie.


Love, love is a verb
Love is a doing word
Gentle impulsion
Takes you over your fears



I've tripped again and things are
starting to get strange
in my mind.
There's a shark in the pool
and a witch in the tree
Something's scratching the door
and I hear footsteps in the hall
We're a world apart
How can you save me
when the dark comes in
and eats my soul?

You say it's everything in my mind
But I know a day will come
when you won't know my name
and I think


Hey boy take a look at me
Let me dirty up your mind
I will strip away your heart
And see what I can find
So lay your hands over me
and feel
what you can only see
(you can touch me if you want)


You know, I know how it feels.
Yes, mistakes have been made, but you'll only make them again if you try to go back.
We're a world apart and still I can hear your voice calling my name.

Come with me
Come to my sweet melodie
And this make believe will
get you through another lonely night.


Pixie

image from here

Lie to me

and say I am everything you could ever wish for.


Lie to me


and tell me I can do anything.


Lie to me


and make me believe in my wildest dreams.


Lie to me


because the truth is pulling me down right now.

segunda-feira, 25 de janeiro de 2010

This girl

....tries her best everyday, but it's all gone to waste 'cause there's no one around.

This girl, she can draw, she can paint, loves to dance she can skate....now she don't make a sound.


This girl's got to work, got to swet just to pay what she gets to get left all alone.



I'm still here, but it hasn't been easy...

segunda-feira, 11 de janeiro de 2010

It's winter...


...and my feet are cold.


My heart is still beating. So, I'm fighting.


quarta-feira, 6 de janeiro de 2010

hey love

I'm walking alone in the dark alleys of this city I love despite I can't feel as my own, sensing the murmur of all the million lives that cross my existence.

"stay...hey love, we're you're running to?"

"I'm running to catch my life, I don't wan't to waste any minute"

I linger in this mist, not knowing if I'm awake or dreaming. And I smile. Couldn't be any better.
What am I expecting? Everything. And absolutly nothing. I have no interest in anything you're not willing to give me and looking forward to be surprised by all the things we'll going to do.
And what am I giving in return? Nothing. And everything.

"Hey...what a beautiful mess this is"

See, I've always wanted to kiss you, but I always runned from you. Fortunatly you kissed me, and well, I kissed you back.


I'm almost finally without words.





Can't wait to feel your smile pressed against mine

domingo, 3 de janeiro de 2010